They need to quickly change the name of this song for a third time.  This is 100% pure Guy Gone Wild.  She could have been sued over that title too.  This clip is a cross between a Cazwell and Kazaky video.  Kazaky are rumored to be in the video as well.  Madonna is just in the way.  She should shift her attention to directing gay pron now!

Models featured include: 

Simon Nessman, Sean O’Pry, Rob Evans and Jon Kortajarena

BTW, it’s nice to see that Madonna’s figured out who her audience is.  Time for the male coughgaycough fashion line already!  This woman is all about the $$$.  Cash in, bitch!  Kylie had it right all along.  Enuff with the str8 dancers on tour Madonna!  If they’re going to be hetero, they better be in g-strings!

So, which lucky fella won the contest of becoming Madonna’s next boyfriend (this is how she keeps picking them up - I like her style!):

Simon Nessman (too old?)

Sean O’Pry

Rob Evans (luvs the dark meat, but usually of the Latin variety, unless you count Dennis Rodman):

Jon Kortajarena (was rumored to be fucking him a year ago):

Crazy girl rocking out in library

It is me, I’m RosstorWho.  You’re here for me, and I’m here for you.

RosstorWho, the adorable, sexy, British, gay Dr Who fan, who tells horribly lame jokes, but is entertaining all the same, is my new obsession.

I was introduced to the world of Who thanks to the relentlessly un-decaffeinated Youtuber, RolyUnGashaaHD.

Roland basically spearheaded Ross’ desire to keep making Youtube videos.

Apparently, this is the story in a nutshell:

-RosstorWho, a new Youtuber is discoverd by Roland.

-Roland contacts Ross.

-Roland makes a video response to Ross, reading a poem he’s written for him.

If this is all it takes to pick up a man on Youtube, I’ll gladly write a few sonnets… well, at least a couple of knock knock jokes.

AnyWho…

I was not without my suspicions regarding the link between Ross and Roland.  Ross began appearing in Roland’s videos.  Yes, he traveled to see Roland. The two apparently live a considerable distance from one another — Roland in Devon, and Ross, uh, elsewhere.  Were these two already in a relationship? Are they in cahoots with one another, trying to gain views and become Youtube partners?  Is this all a scam to rake in some dough?  This wouldn’t be a first for Youtube. I’ll avoid naming names, but you can probably already guess who I’m referring to.

Ross also struck me as being a little “too natural” or “too perfect” when it came to his online personality.  Was he a strugling entertainer, an actor down on his luck, who created a Youtube account to get noticed?  Was he playing a character? Again, we’ve seen this plenty of times.  Ross does remind me of a lovable Harry Enfield creation.

Ross has a very nice guitar led opening.  Is he a musician?  Ross shows off his ability to effortlessly slip into a variety of regional accents.  A sign of an actor? Ross even revealed his childhood passion of becoming a DJ/MC of some sort. “Put your hands in the air, and wave them like you just don’t care” Ross belts out in a pitch perfect professional voice-over artist sort of way.  Hmm, suspicious. 

With all these suspicions, I did a little a digging.  Okay, a little stalking.  Ross’ real name is Ross Toomey.  Nothing appears to link him to any sort of entertainment background.  Bottom line: “He’s clean”, as a prison guard would say while removing his rubber gloves.

While I’ll admit that this is incredibly selfish, I hope Ross doesn’t get thousands of viewers.  Every time a Youtuber gets big, their videos turn to shit, and they begin to feel that they have to mainstream in order to appeal to a wider audience.  The camera equipment they acquire thanks to new revenue, ensures that we get to see them in HD, with a million different special effects and props.  I don’t know about you, but there’s something endearing about the amateur quality of Youtube videos.  They don’t have to be horrible looking, but they do appear to have been created by someone who is just like you and me, doing videos for fun, a person who puts in a hell of a lot more effort in making their videos the best that they can possibly be with very limited resources.

Like I said: selfish.  With someone as entertaining as Ross, I doubt it will take long for him to continue catching on to a much bigger audience.

But in the meantime, here’s looking at you, RosstorWho!